Top 10 Things About Colostomy

colostomy10) Road trips devoid of worst case pooping scenarios.

9) 96% reduction in sling time.

8) Variety of cute sounds from opening.

7) Perverse enjoyment of other people having to endure smell while I smell nothing, courtesy of tracheostomy.

6) Superfluous anus.

5) Hallie’s bizarre obsession with it… Several jingles and a new nickname: “Sexy poop bag ALS guy who drools guy in murka”.

4) Don’t have to endure strange wiping techniques by variety of caregivers.

3) Amazing insights into the wonders of gastro-intestinal system.

2) Modern medicine succeeds in circumventing natural order with most beneficial outcome.

1) Freedom from the tyranny of shitting – not having to live in constant fear of pooping.


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